It´s time to live your love

Hey all,
thank you for being faithful readers and followers. I appreciate that here I have my secret place to share what i´m emotionally going through, heal and process my life in togetherness with you-

I have realised again, how important it is to watch your circles
The people you listen to, the people who want to advice you, what you read and listen to, everything tries to mold your reality and influence your life
This can have a tremendous effect on your behaviour and thoughts and then your life!
Those people can be anyone. Parents, friends, therapists, healers, enemies, colleagues
We need to start getting the connection to ourselves and listen only to our own hearts and get in touch with our spirit
Others have agendas too and they simply are not living our karma, our story, our feelings, they are not walking in our shoes...

Hermiting changes you and it can increase an incapability for relationships like I have at times, but you are less exposed to manipulation and bullshit from the world that clutters our inner voice
Sometimes we need to retreat from the world in order to come out reborn with new approach and outlooks for life
But we need to find balance within solitude and social engagement
A serious relationship saves you years of therapy I got told

Certainly I do not know it all and do not have the answer to everything, 
I´m just error and trial, myself
There is so much that I need to heal, work on, work through and overcome
Realising and letting go of what is not for us, is the hardest part...

I fall in Love, I realise my trust issues due to my experiences, too many expectations, I am sensitive, spiritual, loose ground at times which comes across as unreasonable and childish. 
Love never gets wise and it doesn´t need to

I´m a perfectionist, I question everything, every construct that is being told by the social norm, I question myself and others all the time
I go into temples to learn wisdom, on cruiseships, all around the world, just to make more experiences which hurt me, but teach me. 

Aren´t we all trying to make sense of life, love and what is happening through us?

It all made me richer and the more real I get, the more unreal the world gets
Maybe I went so far to rebuild my definition of it all. I had lost my believe in everything
So I am coming to a rest now. I want to become what society calls "normal",
Grounded, stabilize myself and grow roots that nurture, heal and build

My relationship to men has become deeper but also more difficult as I do not trust easylie anymore I guess everytime I meet someone whom I fall in Love with, it doesn´t work out, cause I am not the perfect Woman they see in me, and I act different than to what people think of how I am

I am who I am, healing myself in a very complex, paradox, superficial world where people are easylie distracted and expecations are high and unrealistic

There is also a lot of Love and peace in this world so let´s shift our focus on that

 I cry and I laugh about it all, since thankfully I can see the triviality of it all
I am grateful for everything, as I know that we are here for learning, growing, evolving although things feel like losses and acceptance is hard, but maybe they are actually gains....
Life is a paradox and Love is the gift we get by enduring it
Embrace it as an adventure and let it unfold in front of you
Logic is not always our best answer. Kindness is. Teamwork and keeping an open heart is
Most of the times we need to use our Soul and heart and be a bit more rebellious...